THE US OF A

On Sunday morning we packed up all our belongings into Crystal the car and headed off for the US of A. “Only two hours to Seattle,” Adam said, “only a quick drive” he assured us. So there we were, squished into Crystal, Zane and I in the back all snuggled up against the door on the right-hand side as we had to put down a seat to accommodate for our massive haul of skis and snowboards and whatnot.

It started off great, sing-a-longs and root beer. And then we got to the border crossing. Where we waited. And waited. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand waited. Like, forever. I understand in this day and age security is really necessary, but all I’m saying is, it’s hard not to be frustrated when you’ve consumed 2 litres of root beer and you can’t move your arms more than twelve millimetres and the only radio station you can find plays non-stop country and it’s hot and you’re cranky. We were cruising down the highway at an epic speed of about 1 km per hour. Eventually however, we got to the crossing (cheers rang out across the range) and the obligatory stern American was there to glare at us and demand the answers to lots of questions.

Who are you? Where are you going? How long are you in the States for? All this stuff for three days?

After the interrogation at the crossing we were ushered into an office for Visa checks and fingerprinting. After we were all printed up and on the system, we were free to get back on the road. Straight after our release our top priority was food. I was hankering for some nice big juicy ribs or chicken wings or something terribly Yankee and Fattee and oh were my prayers answered at Bob’s Burgers and Brews. Zane and I both had the Western Bar-B-Q Burger, a calorific fat-fest of a 6 oz slab of meat, 3 slices of bacon, crispy fried onion rings, cheese, salad, ranch and barbecue rib sauce. Oh Yeah. Just thinking about it gives me heart palpitations.

When we got to our hotel we decided that, rather than lug all our ski and snowboard stuff up to the room, we’d just leave it in the car. That was until Adam looked on trip advisor and read a recent review from a gentleman that had his work vehicle stolen from the car park of the same hotel not once, but twice. Nice. Having said that though, the hotel has been really nice, and I haven’t felt unsafe at all, and we’ve been walking to nearby take-out places for dinner at night. Luckily no one has tampered with Crystal.

Yesterday we got some retail therapy at this massive outlet shopping town where all these brands were on sale for at least 50% off. We got our shop on. In moderation though. We all got nice Winter Freezing-Fernie-proof jackets. In the afternoon, Zane and Adam went to the Boeing factory. There they have the biggest building IN THE WORLD based on volume. In it they make one 737 every day. Soon they will be accredited to make the new 787’s and they will be making one every three days.

While the boys nerded it up with planes, Robyn and I continued our assault on the shops. After a tough day, we were ready for a beer. We asked a lady in one of the shops for directions to the nearest bar and she pointed us in the direction of another Bob’s Burgers and Brews. “It’s just next door” she said, “really close”. Yeah, we’d heard that before. Nonetheless, our thirst propelled us onwards to Bob’s. After 15 minutes of stumbling through the wilderness, a casino appeared like a mirage in the desert. But it was not to be. We went in singing ‘hey big spender’ discussing how much we’d have to bet before we’d be offered free cocktails. We walked out approximately 2 minutes later, having been kicked out by surly bar staff that wouldn’t accept our Aus ID. Obviously, in our haste to get to the shops, we’d neglected to pack our passports. We were getting desperate. And thirsty. Another fifteen minutes later we stumbled into Bob’s, parched like the desert, only to be turned away, yet again, thirsty. Devastation. I tried to look on the bright side. At least we looked youthful. So we sat in Bob’s, drinking our Diet Dr. Pepper, eating our chicken wings, and knitting.

Thankfully, when we caught up with the boys, they were thirsty as well so we sent Adam into a Bottle-O (he looks the oldest) and he soon returned with 2 six-packs of Bud for $13! Amazing.

Tomorrow, we’re going to get Crystal’s brakes fixed and then hopefully we’ll be ready to go to Fernie! Can’t wait to get our SNOW ON OH YEAHHHH.
Love, T and Z.